A place for endometriosis survivors & supporters, and all that goes with it.


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*UPDATED* I sold a bracelet and I’m pretty psyched

Behold, a garnet and silver stardust bracelet on elastic, made for the 8th birthday of one of my coworkers’ daughters:

Natural garnet and silver-plate stardust beads on elastic, y'all.

Natural garnet and silver-plate stardust beads on elastic, y’all.

My first bracelet sold since I was in college! I’m so proud. Hope she likes it! Happy birthday, Emma!

Email me or leave a comment if you want your very own pure gemstone goodness. :)

**UPDATE** From my coworker: “Emma loved the bracelet. She put in on immediately and kissed it and has not taken it off. … Dad did good and you helped. Way to go.” SO CUTE!**

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Update on the little man

This is a follow-up to a post I made recently, detailing some health issues with my dog, Pippin.

Image

On one recent Sunday, I took Pippin to work. He’s the best in the biz.

Long story short: NO SURGERY FOR THE SMALL DOG! The ultrasound shows a nodule on his pancreas, and some of his organs were a bit enlarged, but there’s no cancer, no foreign object stuck in his gut, and absolutely no need for surgery, as the first vet had pressed so firmly into my brain.

Basically, his big tummy was full of air and food that was fermenting, which was the culprit in his gastro issues. He’s a small dog that’s getting older and the high-fiber vet food just wasn’t right for him. I put him on soft food of a different brand for a bit, but when that didn’t stop the gastrointestinal distress, we put him on the tried-and-true diet for doggy diarrhea: chicken and rice. He’s been eating it since with only one short-lived gastro issue over the weekend when we relented and gave him a bite of egg white.

No more panting all night like a cow in labor. No more shitting himself. No more tear-inducing farts that wake us up out of a dead sleep in the middle of the night.

My dog did not have cancer. My dog had to take a shit and change his diet. THANKS, VET NO. 1, FOR THE PANIC. I guess doctors of all shades can be total dipshits.

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In truths that she learned, or in times that he cried

So how do you measure a year?

This is one of everybody’s favorite songs from RENT, “Seasons of Love.” I was and am a giant RENThead and was able to introduce the movie to Phil on Christmas Eve. Not as grand as the stage version, but I’d actually forgotten just how powerful it is. And it always strikes me extra hard that the writer, Jonathan Larson, never even got to see just how far his story would reach into the world: He died of a heart problem the night of RENT’s final dress rehearsal, the result of his until-then-unknown Marfan’s Syndrome.

Here’s the video I meant to post for the New Year (see previous entry as to why it was delayed). I chose this one over one from the movie because it’s more full and is the original Broadway cast (OBC) version. There’s plenty of videos online if you want to see it sung by the actors; it’s moving.

Lyrics:
ALL
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes,
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Moments so dear.
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes
How do you measure, measure a year?

In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights
In cups of coffee
In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife.

In five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes
How do you measure
A year in the life?

How about love?
How about love?
How about love? Measure in love

Seasons of love. Seasons of love

JOANNE
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes!
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Journeys to plan.

Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes
How do you measure the life
Of a woman or a man?

COLLINS
In truths that she learned,
Or in times that he cried.
In bridges he burned,
Or the way that she died.

ALL
It’s time now to sing out,
Though the story never ends
Let’s celebrate, remember a year in the life of friends
Remember the love!
Remember the love!
Seasons of love!

JOANNE(while ALL sing)
Oh you got to got to
Remember the love!
You know that love is a gift from up above
Share love, give love spread love
Measure measure your life in love.
Seasons of love, seasons of love


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Quote of the day from Vincent van Gogh

“I am seeking. I am striving. I am in it with all my heart.” ~Vincent van Gogh

That’s me at the beach in Tamil Nadu state, Southeastern India, Oct. 2011 — my dream trip realized!


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Endo Month, Day 16: ‘It’s always darkest before the dawn’

Got home late on Thursday night because I chose to fight the inclination to stay at home on my day off and went out with my mom and her co-worker, Angelique, for a cheap but grand wine tasting evening at a cozy local spot in San Marco called The Grotto. Five dollars for seven wines, not including the cost of the flatbreads and cheeses we ate. I’ll post more about it later today.

It was a definite toss-up on what to feature for my first post today, but in the end it came down to the following: It’s Friday, we need a power song, and I certainly need a power song as I head off to meet with a new doctor whose specialty is apparently endometriosis and is a minimally-invasive surgeon. So please keep me in your thoughts until I come back to you to share them.

I love Florence and the Machine, and this song is pure magic. It’s like soaring. I can feel something deep and dear puff up in my chest and I think of standing with pride and flying when I hear it. And it definitely speaks to what’s in us, calling on us to shake off the weight of the world. As the chorus says, “It’s hard to dance with a devil on your back/So shake him off.”

If I could have this song pumped into my ears when I need it the most, I’d definitely pay for that luxury.

So without further ado, here is “Shake It Out” by Florence and the Machine (lyrics below, some special ones bolded). A strong and beautiful day to you all.

Shake It Out” by Florence and the Machine
Regrets collect like old friends
Here to relive your darkest moments
I can see no way, I can see no way
And all of the ghouls come out to play

And every demon wants his pound of flesh
But I like to keep some things to myself
I like to keep my issues drawn
It’s always darkest before the dawn

And I’ve been a fool and I’ve been blind
I can never leave the past behind
I can see no way, I can see no way
I’m always dragging that horse around

All of his questions, such a mournful sound
Tonight I’m gonna bury that horse in the ground
So I like to keep my issues drawn
But it’s always darkest before the dawn

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah

And it’s hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

I am done with my graceless heart
So tonight I’m gonna cut it out and then restart
Cause I like to keep my issues drawn
It’s always darkest before the dawn

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah

And it’s hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

And given half the chance would I take any of it back
It’s a final mess but it’s left me so undone
It’s always darkest before the dawn

Oh woah, oh woah…

And I’m damned if I do and I’m damned if I don’t
So here’s to drinks in the dark at the end of my rope
And I’m ready to suffer and I’m ready to hope
It’s a shot in the dark and right at my throat
Cause looking for heaven, for the devil in me
Looking for heaven, for the devil in me
Well what the hell I’m gonna let it happen to me

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah

And it’s hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah

And it’s hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah


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Endo Sucks, Day 12: The best endometriosis video I’ve ever seen

Seriously, this is the best video breaking down what endometriosis is about that I have seen to date. It is perfect for sharing as an introduction to endo or as a refresher.

Click the image to see the video.

Produced by Endometriosis.org, it is currently being featured on the the website of Bradley Method instructor Kim Stanley in Tallahassee, Florida. A doula friend of mine, Erinn Streeter, works with her on her website and they have had this video on their welcome page for the month of March to honor endometriosis. I think that often, endometriosis survivors are so beaten down by the medical system even as we try to work with and fight within it, that they enter childbirth the same way: hands open and begrudgingly accepting whatever the doctors provide, without question. This is probably true for most Western moms-to-be — far too many, in fact. It has produced an C-section epidemic and shot maternal mortality rates so high because we are taught to live life in fear and pain and to ask no questions.

But we have options in our healthcare — and if you take one great thing from endometriosis, PCOS or adenomyosis, let it be the advocacy you are practicing for your healthcare. YOU are the best thing that can happen to you! Nobody else can advocate for you or educate you if you do not take a personal investment in knowing how strong you really are. I was worried a few years ago that doula training might mess with my emotions, but instead it rocked my world and opened me up in awesome ways. I am never more proud than when I am welcomed by a couple into the most powerful journey of their lives, no matter how their birth unfolds. At least they went in educated, open, and knowing not only that they are made of power but that they have a world of loving support around them.

AND SO DO YOU.


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“I can be changed by what happens to me, but I refuse to be reduced by it.” Maya Angelou

“I can be changed by what happens to me, but I refuse to be reduced by it.” Maya Angelou

via “I can be changed by what happens to me, but I refuse to be reduced by it.” Maya Angelou.

Found this from new follower No Ruff Days. Awesome quote, and if you’re in the mood to smile about dogs, this is the site for you! Can’t imagine ever putting highlights in my dog’s fur though…