I want to blame my boss splitting my days off for being so tired and out of synch, but I don’t know if that’s fair.
Eh, who said life was fair?
Got up exceptionally late after another fun night of getting to bed late and not sleeping well. I keep having vivid dreams, several involving former boyfriends. I guess it’s on my mind lately?
Despite big plans of working out, cleaning and fixing my dishwasher, I was lucky to get an hour at the gym and a shower in before going to dinner at 8:30 with my friend Jenn and her husband. After the gym I sat down on my bed and apparently fell asleep, missing an essential phone call from Jenn about the time of the dinner. Weird.
Today is basically the deadline for signing up for doula training this coming weekend and I have certainly taken my sweet time about registering. Part of the reticence is financial: We just received a company-wide pay cut and now, after 2.5 years with the same company, I’m making 46 cents more than when I first started here. Jenn, who is working on her master’s in public administration, compared it to grad school — there’s never really a great time for it. I explained my hesitance to go for it to Jenn as being largely emotional (due to potential TTC bitterness), and that is true to an extent … except that, when talking with my 8-months-pregnant coworker who also has endo, she let me feel the fundus and feel her daughter as she rolled in her stomach, beneath my hands. And I walked away so excited, knowing that this was a field for me.
I kept that feeling close to me as I paid for the classes online and will continue to remember why I’m enrolling: for women’s choice in healthcare, as well as to give myself a better future as I better other women’s experiences.
Birthing babies, starting Friday morning!